"I'm Good"

There are so many cultural expressions over here that I am still finding myself getting used to after all these months.  One of those is responding with “I’m fine”, or “I’m alright” when asked if I need help – instead of with “I’m good” as I usually would in The States.  I first realized this cultural difference a couple months ago when we had our friends Maurice & Fiona over for dinner.  The four of us were chatting as the dinner cooked when Dave went into the kitchen to check on the food.  I heard one of the pots start to boil over, and I asked him if he needed me to come help him.  He responded with, “No, I’m good”.  Maurice & Fiona chuckled to themselves, and then explained that if someone here were to use that response it would mean more that the responding person was telling the other person that he was well behaved instead of not needing assistance.  I’ve tried to remember that caveat as I have been out and about, but apparently that response is more hard-wired into me than I realized.  We were at church the other Sunday and a fellow congregant, Joan, approached me and asked me if I wanted any coffee or tea.  I responded with “I’m good” (within earshot of Maurice) and Joan looked at me peculiarly and said, “Yes, I know you’re good, but I was inquiring as to whether or not you were thirsty”.  Maurice and Dave immediately started snickering, especially since they were the only ones who understood the joke/accidental cultural faux pas I had just committed.   I think at this point I am starting to run out of times to use of my “I’m an American, please forgive my ignorance” card, but there are still times like this when I am finding need for it.  I am trying to do more thinking before American phrases pass through my lips and do more of “when in Rome, do as the Romans”.  However, at this rate by the time I head back to the U.S. I will have just gotten down the North Irish cultural sayings and will have to adjust again and turn my brain back to “American English Mode”.

Balls in Europe

The other day, Dave made an observation: “I’ll bet this year has seen the most Balls in Europe since WWII.”  By “Ball”, he was referring to my mom’s side of the family (the Balls), and I think he might be right.  In WWII, my grandpa, Devere, and his older brother, Don, and younger brother, Delos, served the U.S. as soldiers in Europe.  Prior to that, Francis Ball & his father, William, extended the branch of the Ball family tree to America when they boarded the Mayflower and made their way to upstate New York.  Their decedents eventually found Cadillac, Michigan, and members of the Ball family still live on that Ball Family Farm.  However, this year has for some reason seen a bumper crop of Balls making their way back to Europe, the most in one year since WWII.  The first wave of Balls coming back to Europe in January began with me, followed by my mom and sister visiting us this summer, my cousin Kody visiting Italy this summer, and my cousin Jason and his wife visiting Germany and Ireland (including popping up to Belfast and seeing Dave and me for a couple of days) this fall.  The next member of the Ball family to arrive in Europe is due 3 weeks from Sunday.  This will be the first birth of a Ball in Europe, who can trace his or her lineage to the Balls who came over on that historic ship, since King James I ruled England.  2013 has shaped up to be quite the monumental year for the Ball family and connecting back to its European roots.

Raising a Child in the Village

“It takes a village to raise a child.”  This might be a clichéd and tired saying, but it is also a very truthful one for our current situation.  Dave and I have been moved by how much the people of Northern Ireland and Belfast in particular like to take care of those who live here.  It is very difficult for someone to fall through the cracks.  Our church knows that we don’t have any family nearby except for a lengthy plane ride across a very wide ocean, and so they are doing everything they can to lift us up and know that there will be at least a loving church family to help us after the baby is born.  We have had grannies volunteer free babysitting, mothers offer to lend baby supplies, and one couple volunteer a ride to and from the hospital when the big day arrives.  Another area of feeling raised up and protected has been our antenatal (North Irish for “prenatal”) care and education courses.  Our antenatal care has been top rate care.  We are first timers to a viable pregnancy and at the start were still mentally and physically exhausted from all the work it took to have a viable pregnancy.  Thus, it was a relief to come into a prescribed system where we didn’t have to think and were told exactly how many scans (their word for “ultrasound”) we would need and when we would need to go to our doctor’s office to get checked up by her or our midwife.  It has been reassuring to be reminded that a woman who is pregnant is not a woman who is ill.  Rather, it is a woman who needs health checks but other than that can continue on with her regular healthy lifestyle.  The antenatal classes at the hospital left us with lots of information and a feeling that the midwives and doctors here won’t let us fail.  The “village” of Belfast will be helping us after the baby is born in the form of a house-visiting midwife.  Post birth, we will have daily visits for at least ten days and up to a month at our home from our midwife to answer any and all questions we might have.  She will also give me advice on breastfeeding, give me a pat on the back when I have the baby latched on correctly, and reassure these two first time parents that we are doing great.  It all makes it feel a little less intimidating to have a baby in a foreign land.  We are thankful to be a part of this village, to be a part of a country that is holding our hands as we bring our baby into the global community.